On today’s segment of waiting room adventures, we begin with a slight change in scenery for a few different reasons. One of the major changes is they have actually carried in lounging chairs, they’re an adorable puke green pleather with a mahogany wood trim (I really think it’s cheap press board). They actually look rather comfortable, and I may have taken a small nap on one today, but for some reason I’m in the same curled up scrunched up position tonight. I’m really getting used to sleeping on these things, my back has contorted itself which now makes it comfortable to sleep on these chairs. I just can’t bring myself to spend a night on the reclining chair.
The room is pretty empty tonight; we have the one snorer who is a very sweet guy, whom we’ve termed the secretary. He wakes up early (Yea he’s the yeller) and answers the phone when it rings when everyone is still slow to move, he knows everyone’s family and is always asking about how they’re doing. He really is a kind hearted man, and even though I give him a hard time in the blog (I only do it to sell more copies), I really enjoy having him as a house guest.
The only other occupant is a lady in her 70’s or so. She’s been a guest with us for about 3 days. She’s a quiet, sweet lady who has been having a rough time. Her husband of 32 years has been getting the run around from many doctors and went undiagnosed with diabetes for awhile. He recently began to have signs of a stroke and the doctors again brushed it off. He is now in the ICU, because of a stroke, they believe he may have had another one to the other side of his brain and now has no response to stimulus or movement in either side of his extremities. As I was talking with Barb she was telling me her story and how she enjoys seeing our family, and how well we seem to be holding up for being here so long. I began to tell her that it has gotten easier to an extent, because it starts to become familiar to you, and you start to see the differences or the changes in the positive directions. (If she would have seen me the first couple days, she definitely would not have been saying the same thing.) She then began to go on and tell me how she feels like he’s ready and that if he isn’t going to be himself then she’s ready for him to pass on. As things like this are hard to hear, I think I’d feel the same way in her shoes. It would be tough to cognitively be with it, but not able to express your feelings through words or actions. I just can’t imagine.
Our talk made me realize again how lucky we are, we have a great supporting cast, friends, family, co-workers, and many I have no idea if they’ve met any of us but they know a friend or are friends of friends. Everyone is praying and we’re seeing miracles happen. You know it’s in God’s hands when doctors come up and tell us, it’s a miracle he’s doing well and improving! I’m thankful for the opportunity to get to know other people suffering through the same trials we are, it’s terrible that this is how we’ve had to meet, but we all seem connected and bonded.
I guess the moral of my late night rant is although this has been a crazy roller coaster ride thus far, we need to realize people go through this every day. Please be thinking of those people as well, especially Barb and her husband Bob. I’m afraid he won’t be with us much longer, and although she is a very strong lady, she needs prayer as well. You can tell this is breaking her heart, and in turn it hurts ours. I know she feels like it’s his time to go, but it’s never easy.
Friday –sleeping day 12 I think…
I woke up today to a little good news. The first information I heard was that Pop’s bowels were working a little. Although it wasn’t much, it’s better than nothing and we’re happy we’re starting to see a little function. The other good news was that Barb’s husband was doing a little better this morning, she said he was a little more responsive, but as everyone knows this is one large roller coaster ride (with an expensive riding fee).
We’ve been abiding by waiting room hours recently because dad has been sedated and relaxing peacefully. I know the nurses aren’t big fans of families being in the rooms consistently, but sometimes it helps ease the anxiety. Dad hasn’t really been anxious, but today was a different story. He was hiccupping again, which always causes him to wake up. He was more with it today, and stayed awake much longer. It was very difficult to get him to calm down and relax, I’m not sure if it was because he was coughing trying to get mucous through the tube, or he was just anxious of everything that was going on. It seemed as if our great respiratory therapist Laurie was able to calm him down more than we could. I feel that he knows we’re here, and gets anxious and worried. It seems as if he’s uncomfortable in bed, and is very restless. He moves around a lot, and kicks his legs, but it’s so hard to determine what he really wants. I feel kind of helpless at times, and wondering what I can do to help. At times I try to stay out of site, so he can relax and not get too worked up, but then a big parts of me wants to be here and try to comfort and try to help him relax.
A new nurse (for us) is working the day shift today. It’s always tough for us when we have a new people caring for dad. I’m not sure if we just like the familiarity, or if we just like the care we receive better, but it’s never fun with a new nurse to start with. I think that the others know our family pretty well, and feel comfortable with us, and keep an open mind to what we ask or say. We can tell if something is different because we’ve been with him for two weeks. It’s also more difficult to deal with when he’s not doing well (like he is today), because it puts us all on edge to begin with.
At 5 dad was resting well, he’s twitching in his right arm and shoulder a little and is still battling hiccups. When he wakes up, he reaches for his chest (which is difficult because he has restraints). His face grimaces, his teeth clinch and it’s obvious he’s in pain. We release his hand restraints when we’re in the room and he reaches for the tubing. We don’t want him to get a hold of it, because he might pull it out. He may just want to feel it and see what it is, but we don’t want to take the chance.
The past two Sundays haven’t been good for us. Two weeks ago he had a heart attack, and last week he had his set back and the stent repaired. We’re hoping this Sunday breaks the trend and we don’t want to start skipping every Sunday. It’s been a struggle today with some of the weekend staff, some doctors come in and want to change some of his medicine that our normal doctors specifically told us they wanted to wait till Monday to start to wean slowly. I’m starting to see the other side of healthcare, and I think I’m starting to realize how I can change and become more open and sympathetic to families and their feelings. You get a better handle on things when you experience it first-hand. It’s a tough way to learn lessons, but it’s one pretty darn good way to learn.
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